Well, this might be my last blog entry for a while now. I am returning my aunt’s laptop to its rightful owner. So it’s back to paper and pen. And I won’t be online at night anymore. So it’s back to sms and call. And no more playing games and minesweepers, it’s back to listening music and playing guitar. No more designing using Photoshop, it’s back to sketching and drawing. No more heavy bag even without books, but it’s gonna be the books that cause the weigh. Well, it’s gonna be very different! But it’s inevitable. =)
Being in poly has surely changed my lifestyle a lot. With all the rushing for deadline and those kinda’ stuff, not to mention staying back in school till late at night, now poly really feels like my 2nd home. On top of that, I saw many things about how boys and girls act in a manner quite… distinctly, around me. Or perhaps it is something common that I could not comprehend? Secrecy and openness… attraction and repulsion… doubts and assurance.
A person can be so unsure about his or her own feelings, that they do not know what to do. Being uncertain, most of the time their decision will at least hurt a person, if not, both. Some thinks that he or she wants because of something genuine and real, when truly it is just a yearning. Wine for the day, champagne for the night. Some gives and never receive from the one they gave to, some shares but wants more. Some lost it and quits, some treasures it but it slips away.
Yeap, the hardest language to understand is still our own feelings. Like what I read from somewhere, “I confused my feelings with the truth” – and it can be the other way around. Sometimes I wonder why feelings can be so deceiving. Hey, it’s not all about that “feeling” between boys n girls and all this stuff… what about family? Some of you can say, “What about it?”… heh, well, good for you… but sometimes I still wonder the thoughts behind the decisions they made...
Anw, I’m lost for words… I think I’ll stop here. I'll be happier next time, promise... =)
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